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I never really understood this take. To me it’s just a goal that they’re sharing with me. Like if they told me they just got married I’m not going to take it as them gloating about the wedding night specifically.
Prudism. That’s the take.
Rather read Oglaf any day than this pearl-clutching nonsense.
Oglaf is awesome!
I don’t know any context about the artist or anything that might change it, but my initial take was that it’s mocking the pearl clutching, not partaking in it.
Well you see you’re not a massive pervert.
I agree with AyuTsukasa, I don’t understand it. And I am a massive pervert, like a serious deviant.
Unfortunately(fortunately?) you’re not as massive a pervert as the artist. I mean I don’t even know what extra long tongues have to do with reproduction - seems the character they drew is just so constantly horny they hallucinate their fetish at the slightest mention of anything related to sex.
Well I AM a massive pervert and I agree with them
I also don’t get it. By extension one should also see the same “disgusting” reaction about absolutely everyone’s parents. Because guess what, this is how we reproduce.
Yet most people aren’t shocked when they learn somebody has children.
Wait, what? There’s no way my parents ever … What!!! OMG …
Nah you were adopted.
I know my mother fucks, in fact she has a wildly active sex life after the divorce. Doesn’t mean I want to hear about it.
But if a pregnancy happens it would be good to know about cause that has a LOT of things related to that fact that needs to be considered.
But just trying to have a kid? Why the fuck do I want to hear about other people fucking if I’m not involved. Unless your inviting me to join keep it to your self.
I’m happy to say grats on the pregnancy after the fucking is done tho, but seriously… Phrasing and context matters people.
Also why does having a baby automatically have to be about the sex? Yes you need sex to have one but thats not the point. People want kids.
You don’t need sex to have a kid, actually. There’s the adoption process and IVF as well. Both would also technically be “trying for a baby”, but people usually are more specific when talking about those.
Do you know how many years it takes to adopt a kid, assuming that you actually do get to adopt one and aren’t turned down?
That was exactly my point. It absolutely qualifies as “trying to/working on having a kid”, definitely as much or more so than tracking cycles for unprotected sex. Similar for the IVF process.
It’s work and it’s not easy.
Making a kid probably takes a year (<3 months to try and conceive, 9 months for pregnancy) or so, unless you have issues with fertility. Adoption can take, like, a decade, assuming that you are considered a suitable adoptive parent in the first place. (I’m pretty sure that many places discriminate against disabled people here, and almost everywhere you have to be married.)
Which just means sex is even more besides the point of having a baby so no need to be so weird about it.
That said It’s pretty important in sex education to acknowledge that babies can result from PIV sex.
they did not say they’re having a baby. they’re trying to have a baby. no baby yet, but they are doing things to have one
I really dont see your point.
Their point is they have sexual hangups.
my point is that it makes no sense for a couple to announce that they just started having sex and there’s no pregnancy yet. when there is now, or if they have been trying for long without success, that could be newsworthy, but otherwise it’s literally just announcing that you two started having unprotected sex.
They probably started the conversation because it’s a big topic for them. It’s a huge decision to make and they want to share it with others. They probably want to talk about the family plans they have, not the practical sex part - but if they did want to talk about sex, there’s nothing wrong about thar either.
but if they did want to talk about sex, there’s nothing wrong about thar either.
It’s wild that this gets pushback here.
The incel adjacent portion of the left is pretty strong and you can find them in droves on Lemmy, it’s amazing how much pushback healthy relationships and sexuality gets on this site, but as long as you chant the same things as other progressives you get a pass for having attitudes that are destructive to society. I’m not sure why we’ve allowed this segment to go unchallenged for as long as we have.
Sexual insecurity is the tool of fascism, it’s not a valid identity to embrace.
Yes, people have sex and it’s perfectly alright to talk about it. There’s nothing bad about being open in that front.
It’s because of the term trying. They are TRYING to have a kid, which explictedly means they are fucking.
Now on the other hand if you said “we are pregnant and having a kid” that’s different. Your sharing the actual event of having the kid and that the wife is actively pregnant. This also has the secondary effect of notifying those it’s told to that the wife may need special consideration due to the pregnancy.
No one gives a fuck or wants to hear about you fucking, but once the fucking is done there is an actual actively useful purpose to telling people that there is an active pregnancy.
Phrasing matters.
I dunno it just seems like a reach to me. It’s just them wanting to share that they decided to take the next step in their relationship. They’re excited and just want others to be excited with them.
Phrasing matters.
Nah, sorry… if this bothers you at all, you have hangups. People talk all the time about their plans for their relationships or future, if you can’t deal with that without having sexual imagery planted into your head, that’s a skill issue. Or maybe a deeper issue that actually does need to be addressed, OCD is a branch of anxiety disorder and are often treated similarly. A lot of people live with OCD and the uninvited thoughts and images it can put in your mind without realizing it’s even a condition and just assume they’re “anxious” but get more and more obsessed with certain words, situations or imagery they can’t shut out.
People have sex and it’s ok to talk about it.
It also does not explicitly mean they are fucking… IVF is pretty common.
Right, and similarly, we shouldn’t tell people that we’re planning to propose. It’s ridiculous to tell your friends about the major changes you are planning for your life. Filthy animals.
/s
Get over yourself.
Lmao this is great
HappyRoadkill rarely misses.
Vixin is their best character. Their back story is perfection!
When someone says “I’m going to the bathroom” they are not guilty of forcing you to visualise them shitting.
Agreed. However, in fairness, if a person goes to the bathroom to poop then one probably will have forgotten by the time they left the room, but if instead a couple looks at each other meaningfully, excuses themselves for a bit, and then returns slightly flustered, then one will have a harder time forgetting.
As another example, if one sees a member of the attractive sex naked, then the first visceral emotional response will be to their sexiness and not to how efficiently their butt could be used for pooping.
So the analogy doesn’t quite fit, and that explains why sex-adjacent things can trigger sex parts of the brain, even when this reaction is undesired, which I think was the point of the comic–not to make some kind of grand statement about the propriety of telling people that you are trying for a baby. (And really, in the end, it is just a dumb joke, and in my opinion the slobbering detracted from the humor value so it was not executed as well as it could have been.)
People have sex in relationships… is it that different if they’re not using protection?
Most couples don’t go around talking about their regular boning schedule over dinner.
I thought ‘boning’ would already be implied among regular adults even if they weren’t talking about it.
Not sure i understand why it’s a big deal tho.
Having a baby is completely aside from it. The sex part is going to be the most insignificant part of that baby’s life.
I can’t speak for you personally but it’s not like everyone goes around imagining our parents doing it just to ponder our existence. Or that our parents pondered every single ancestor doing it just leading to them to have a baby now.
I would hope We all know where babies come from by now. Not sure why a persons brain has to break like it’s a new concept decades after sex Ed. I mean unless your sex Ed was that bad and you just realized now that sex isn’t just a activity for passing time. If so : my condolences. Those instruments betwixt everyone’s legs do have proper function to continue the human race apparently. I know: shocking. Big whoop? There ya go. Maybe you can get back to eating dinner in peace now.
I feel like there are more adults, but not nearly as many grownups as there used to be. Or at least as many as I expected.
Dude, that’s way too fuckin’ deep a comment to read for how close to having just woke up I am. I’m going to be thinking about this all day now.
That’s a fair take.
Everybody poops but I don’t talk about it over dinner
What about breakfast, that first coffee is magical for some.
Mrw my coworker tells me they have to use the bathroom during a meeting and I start violently vomiting from the visceral images and imagined scent of their shit and piss. And then everyone acts like I’M the weird one
WTF is up with Lemmy lately? At times it seems like it’s been overrun by a bunch of pearl clutchers and prudes.
Like, it’s ok to talk about sex. Sex is a natural, healthy component of most relationships. Someone mentioning something adjacently related to sex shouldn’t send you into an R-rated tizzy, and if it does, you might want to examine your thoughts and feelings about sex, because they probably aren’t all healthy.
Basically the state of
RedditLemmy atm
They want us to all go back to saying things like ‘she’s in a delicate condition’ and shit lol
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It honestly seems to be male sexually that people have a problem with.
Does it? Honestly?
Because the dialog seems to always bring on the discussion about rape
Psst. Nearly every human child and adult are the result of a hot stonking genitalia involving mess.
Yuck.
…
I didn’t say stop. Carry on, don’t spare any details!!Visualize this. Where did your mum and dad originate?
The south of England.
I’m trying to picture the English southern countryside but it’s not exactly making me hot and horny 😡The south of England.
Spawned from hedges and stone circles, just like god intended.
That’s good. It should really be getting you cold and clammy, with just the hint of the tang of a nearby sheep in the air. Soft wool sliding down skin as a cold breeze brings salt to your nose, wiping away the sheep’s scent as quickly as your grandmum wiped away the last grime from your gaffer’s stick. Slowly, she leaned over, taping the muff in place so the sound was properly focused on the scene below.
Your grandparents nude and getting at it might do the trick.
Sometimes the mommy and the daddy . . . hold hands.
🥵
Nearly?
A test tube baby delivered by C-section had very little to do with the nethers of either of its parents.
I mean, your “starting ingredients” as it were definitely came from someone’s nethers, but I suppose if you want to be pedantic.
Nah, according to the comics it’s only tongues.
“…And we want to show you how, over and over…”
“Sorry, I think my brain just did a weird thing. Again.”
“No… That actually happened.”
Starts running, doesn’t stop to pack
When your porn addiction is your only personality trait.
Hey now, I will have you know that I am also addicted to video games!
That makes two personality traits.
Serious porn addiction explains so many of the things I see in online forums.
Uh, got any examples? Asking for a friend.
Anytime someone announces their pregnancy, my mind quickly goes to “hah! I knew it! You were doing the sex!”
Same issue when we announced to my in-laws that my gf was pregnant. “Are they just now getting confirmation that our relationship hasn’t just been an innocent friendship with an occasional pecking kiss?”
my ex told her brother “congrats on the creampie” when they announced their pregnancy. pretty sure it was in public with a dozen people in attendance
Some people
ateare so weird about sexEdit: typo
Some people ate so weird about sex
Why wouldn’t I want to imagine it though?
this is the dumbest most infantile shit tbf
It’s possible the OP was created the same way. Do they fixate on their parents having sex everyday of their existence?
These poor people probably just think the people around them are supportive and felt safe to share a life decision. Also didnt want to surprise someone. Imagine they didn’t tell you at all. Like suddenly boom there is a baby in their life.
If they were trying and had one, wouldn’t you want to think you’re a close enough friend to them that they wanted to share that news with you?
People get married and share that as life news. Do you also fixate on their honeymoon sex?
why does it gotta be so weird if someone shares baby news?
I think the joke is just that the individual’s subconscious supplied explicit imagery that the consciousness never asked for, like an intrusive thought. Doesn’t read to me as a comment on the couple sharing the info.
“Sorry, my brain did a thing”, right there.
Edit: it does not seem that the rest of the thread agrees with me lol
Yeah, that’s the joke, but it’s weird that their brain made it monstrous.
Yeah I saw that. Seemed to me like the person is struggling with thoughts about sex. there isn’t even any indication that that is definitely even the way that couple are having a child either. We don’t know if it’s IVF or adoption or it could be sex. But that should be the least important thing in that moment either way. Their friends shared some news with them. Their friends thought they were supportive and close enough to do so.
Few other posters are weirdly upset to hear when someone shares baby info like how dare someone make them think of sex. I don’t think that should be the take away over life changing news.
if they are struggling with thoughts about sex, maybe they look into why they are struggling especially over something like that considering sex Ed should have covered that well before the age of child rearing.
Bro it’s just a joke, it’s not that deep
Tell that to the people talking like they are the ones being offended what with being told someone is thinking about having a baby.
Like geez find better life goals.
People aren’t offended, they are just point out the comical and graphic implications of telling someone you’re trying to get pregnant.
You are inventing outrage that doesn’t exist.
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You sound pretty outraged. It’s been two days and you’re still hung up on this.
Do you really have nothing better to do with your life than being a troll?
anti-natalists really seem to be primarily composed of developmentally stunted eggshells
The funny thing about the comic is that I’ve heard this exact joke from a gay couple, responding to a straight couple saying it.
“What’s your New Years plans?”
“This year, we’re finally going for it. We’re going to try for a baby”
“Oh honey… messy kiss with partner… we’ve been going in raw for years. But hope you have better luck.”
Imagine if a couple said they were considering adoption and someone responded by saying how tight their partner’s butthole is
I mean, again, this joke gets made all the time.
But you do need to know your audience. OP seems to think “we’re trying to have a baby” is personally offensive, so I have to assume they have very thin skin.
Oh yeah of course, I’m sure it was funny in context because most people are fairly normal about the subject of having children
The internet is just amplifying terminally juvenile perspectives as usual
Or maybe… it is just a dumb joke?
I’ve seen this exact comic circulate on Lemmy before. I think it is mildly amusing because it has the dumb kind of humor that I like, but the slobbering kind of made it weird which detracted from the humor value.
This whole thing about the couple sharing they are trying to start their family comes as awfully american and cliché.
Is this a real thing in the US?
And if it is… WHY?!
What is the need for it? Is it some sort of twisted social ritual? A perverse bragging? Why not just do the deed, keep to yourself, and after 9 months present the evidence you’ve been rutting like animals in heat?
Feels to me like a very normal thing to share with people I’m very close with, just sorta sharing life updates and chatting (“I’m looking for a job”, but weightier). But yeah would be really weird outside of that.
But also, no argument about the cliche lol. The one area of human sexuality the US is apparently less prudish about - specifically intending to make babies!
ITT, lots of people with sex hangups and anti-natalist obsessions trying to rationalize being so alone and hung-up that other adults talking about their plans in life makes them feel uncomfortable.
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Certainly some strong opinions and even hostility from some folks, but for myself I don’t find it very fruitful to minimize the suffering caused by isolation the way you’ve done.
It’s a big deal to experience, it’s a chronic thing many find hard or impossible to escape (whatever your opinions on the reasons for that), and I think it’s pretty gross bordering on cruel to dunk on folks that might be experiencing something so painful.
Speaking as a neurodivergent person, this is stupid. This is really stupid.
I am fine with being labeled as “cruel” if it makes you want to work harder to expand your capability to socialize and exercise your brain muscles to put yourself in uncomfortable situations.
If being around healthy couples is triggering to you, that’s massively on you and your responsibility to manage.
This is what a therapist would tell you to do, this is something you can do, and this is something you need to do. Society will not adjust to your unique problems, I am very thoroughly experienced in this hard fact of life. The world will be far, FAR more cruel to you than people on the internet telling you indirectly get your shit together.
Edit: wild how the incels got the whole thing removed. I guess it’s easier to bend to the loud whinging of a minority of people who need to make their problem everyone else’s than let a even a trace of contention stand for others to read and consider. Gotta keep the world atomized doncha know.
So, I can’t decide if you’re directing this at me or just phrasing things unclearly. I’m not in the demographic you’re talking about, at all, never really have been.
I’m expressing sympathy for people who are lonely and who don’t want to be, because the way you phrased your previous set of complaints sounded, among other things, like you mocking people experiencing that. I get that people are being reactive jerks. It’s cuz they’re hurting. I’m not, so the things they are saying about it really don’t bother me (as you can see elsewhere in the thread).
The fact that you’re just doubling down, saying my POV is “stupid”, you’ve shown me all I need to see here. I’m not angry at you, I just think you have some gross views.
And btw, having neurodivergence(s) doesn’t just magically qualify you to speak for others.
And I’m not sure if you’re saying this is an affliction you suffer from or you’re going to bat for the people who do feel that way, and I don’t care. I’m consistent.
We can do a lot for people as individuals, and if someone came up to me in person and said they were struggling with being around me or anyone else because of my relationship or other things outside of their control, I would work to help them and help them fix that issue, I will not however adjust my behavior when it’s normal, harmless behavior. Fuck that. People need social consequence back, it’s a driving force to make people do the hard things instead of just retreat to their discord group of shut-ins who just feed one each other’s isolation and create a deep well of selfish behavior.
If you’re expecting someone to get cowed into tolerating anti-social behavior just because it’s some performative ideal that others wear like some kind of badge of supreme understanding, you won’t find it here, I am fucking more done than I’ve ever been tolerating people who don’t want to build connection and community.
I don’t care how lonely you feel you shouldn’t react to it in a way that drives others away, nor drives you away from others. Our responsibility to care for other people’s feelings ends where it starts to create social harm. It’s unhealthy for yourself and our society broadly and nurturing and tolerating a segment of our population who have sexual/social insecurity is literally how we’re in a place right now where armed nazis are patrolling the streets.
Once in a while you deeply need someone to tell you to get your shit together. I’m sorry our previous generation didn’t go a good job, but we have a responsibility now to be adults.
And if it is… WHY?!
Religious obligation to breed.
The way you put it, it made me think about the fetish, not the act of procreation.
