ECT: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electroconvulsive_therapy
It’s supposedly a last-resort for severe mental health issues, but experts still have no idea how it works and… psychaitry and the brain is still not very well understood, so it kinda feels like a modern version of bloodletting in my opinion.
Honestly, after reading about this stuff… I kinda have this paranoia of: “What if someone already did this to me and I don’t remember it happening due to the side effect of the ECT itself?”
Now I have this fear stuck in my head and I can’t help but constantly wonder if I might have some lost memories… like what if my parents have done much worse abuse to me, and then they managed to convince a doctor to illegally do ECT on me, and then I never remembered any of that?
Am I just overthinking this?
I mean reading about stuff like the plot of Total Recall is scary, but that’s fiction.
ECT is real life…
Now I’m just obsessively worried that: what if what I think I know about myself, my life’s story, might not be my full story… like what if there are dark secrets that my family is hiding from me?
Like y’all ever watched the Men In Black and the neurolyzer thing? I remember feeling very uneasy every time they used that thing, every time that scene came up… I fear the idea of memory erasing more than even death… just the idea of losing who you are, who you were…
(I’m posting this just to try to get this thought out of my head… it’s been bugging me)
Anyone else have similar obsessive thoughts?
I think you need to speak with a therapist and/or psychiatrist regarding these thoughts.
ironically, putting myself in a medical setting would make me more afraid of the thought of like… the fear of a therapist declaring me crazy then doing the involuntary ECT thing…
feel like that would make my anxiety be worse, I could accidentally say the wrong thing and the fear becomes reality